Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Dunno what I'm talkin bout

Okay so. I’m really pissed off. But you don’t need to know about that. I was just saying that so that if I sound particularly morbid or something you know. I’m just pissed off. Nothing to do with what I’m writing about. Actually I don’t know what I am gonna write about. I was just sitting here feeling pissed off and alone and I realized. What the hell, I’ll write on my blog! So here I am, feeling stupid, alone, pissed off, and incredibly friendless considering I’m spending my summer writing on my fucking blog. Damn. That looks a lot worse in writing than I thought it would. “Feed Henry a carrot.” Now that I’ve written that, I have no idea why. Maybe one day I will feed Henry a carrot just to ‘fulfill my destiny.’ My destiny sucks. And now, this song is making me really really sad. It’s making me cry for the second time lately, and I’m so goddamn tired of being in the weirdest fucking mood ever that I want it to end. At whatever cost.
This is stupid. This is pointless. Why am I writing here? Of all the places for me to write shit like this, I never would have guessed that it would be the internet. But it is.
Okay, you know how at the beginning of this, I said that if I sounded particularly morbid it didn’t have anything to do with what I’m writing about? Thats bullshit. Ignore it. Wow, this song isn’t as depressing as the last song, though you would think it would be considering practically the only lyrics are “you made it, you played it, your shit is overrated.” It’s a good song, actually. It just doesn’t seem like it right now I guess. WHAT THE FUCK AM I WRITING?! I have no idea. I should stop. But I have nothing better to do, so here I am, writing stuff I don’t understand, and you, whoever the hell you are, probably don’t either.
Now I don’t know what to write. That first whole part took me a total of what seemed like about 30 seconds to type. And then I sat there for what seemed like about 30 minutes. And now. I don’t know. I want to stop writing, but I sure as hell have nothing else to do. I know, I’ll tell you my old man story. Actually, I just realized I told you my old man story in the last post thing I wrote on here. So, if you want to hear my old man story, which you’ve probably already heard a billion times by now in times when I had nothing better to do, then look back at what I wrote before. It’s near the end. The part at Border’s.
I hate how songs give me such big mood swings. I always have really big mood swings anyway (damn femininity) Haha I spell checked that and it’s right. It was worth it just to know that femininity is a word. Anyway, now I don’t even remember what I was talking about. Oh well. This whole “post” thing or whatever is a waste of time. But I’m stalling anyway... Henry will NEEEEVER finish eating dinner it seems like. How long can it possibly take to eat dinner anyway? I dunno, but I can’t handle this anymore. All of this. Gonna end it or something... maybe I should run into a wall! Haha just kidding... haha I didn’t laugh, haha I didn’t then either. God I’m a fucking idiot. Enough of this, I’m stalling again, can you tell?


Blogger joe said...

well...give it more time...u know wat im talkin about, dont do something your gonna regret in two weeks or days or w.e... and im here buddy

9:01 PM  
Blogger Ruthie said...

I LOVE U GRACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(from your suicidal support team)

3:01 PM  

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